Tuesday, January 27, 2004
- i feel like hell man... nothing i haven't already said... but i tink now i suddenly feel heartsick cos mom started tinking abt gerard, and i worry so abt him. haiz how can he not have time to give a damn about his future when mom's trying so hard to get him to change? it's so sad cos he's my brother and he doesn't care, he doesn't respond, he might as well be a bloody vegetable for all he's saying. how can he be stressed?!?! all he does is rot at home, or outside. he's either bumming ard, or sulking at home. haiz i wish i cld do sth but hell i'm like useless... and yeah sometimes i feel guilty cos everyone's telling me to do something, anything and i just don't know what to do! it sucks cos he's my brother! oh hell! i don't want to see him throw his future away or do something he'll regret forever and a day because he stubbornly refuses to go for counselling and i can tell u it ain't cheap. at one session for $120 that counsellotr is making easy money! dad shld be doing this but no wat does he do? call mom n say u deal with it when a crisis crops up and then leave her to pick up the pieces when gerard goes crazy and that's pretty often too. ohwell why m i going on and on? i sound like a broken record, which i am. heck some one shld give courses on how to be a better sister. i probably need a crash course.
slash with the pen |||
9:47:00 pm
